7:53 AM
these are the carebears which i mention from dearie for each month anniversary..many more not yet get....i love them...i love u dearie...thanks again
lion dance competion day at west coast cc
7:30 AM
another sleepless night for me......haix.....ariel baby....were u notti...did u give people trouble????mummy misses u....hmmm.thinking if i should have breakfast with my aut later..thinking if i should bring belle down to orchard for lunch and walk the baby fair at take..hmm.
yesterday had dinner with dear at redhill market...thereafter headed to gua for his training...his taka lion dance competition is approaching real soon...get the shivers for him...wahahhaha....have faith in him and the team man..however....things were not very nice yesterday....
ok...in his group there is this man called ah tiong....old...shabby short guy....he is really getting on my nerves recently.....actually if u dun come and say me there is nothing i will do..but since u ope ur bloody mouth...u get it from me....
they were setting up the props and everything downstairs at the big carpark.....my lil belle as usual....was eating and walking away.....u know..lil kids....then she went to their safety mattress to lie down...just like her papa....then....ah tiong suddenly shouted....take her to her mother...then he carried her to me..he came up to me and said"if u wanna bring ur kid down look after ur kid"..i was like ...duh~huh????i replied him that I WAS LOOKING AFTER HER WAT.......just that she do not want me to carry and she wants to walk around..
- firstly......the movements of my daughter i cannot control....all i can do is watch her....
- the carpark is ot the hell urs....its a public place for her to walk around
- u are not the head nor in-charge.....just a ...hmm...helper?mover?worker?friend?
- i did not ask u or anyone to carry her at all...
- she is not disturbing u at alll
- why not like that...u sit down and carry her.....se if she will sit there with u quietly or not
- my girl is smarter then u then to sit and not move at all.....maybe ur kid is like an idiot who just sit there..when u say move she move..when u say stay she stay.....or do u have a kid i the first place....
many times u have been saying things and i keep my mouth shut....but sorry....i dun give u a damn....FCUK OFF
after that we headed home when dear finished everything...at my carpark i spoke to dear....i tod him wat i "gao wei"about him...i think very long before deciding to tok to him de....cuz i dun want problems in future and he say i never mention....i just told him that i did not like it when people say me and my girl ad he do not speak up for us....yes..i know he cares...i know he dun want problems...i know he dun wanna be put in a difficult position...but hey dearie.....ur girlfriend kena "bullied"....at least just ask the person to stop it....u know my patter de...u know i will pek cek and flare up.....i know after that u will still do things behind e to tell that person off...but wat i need is realistic...practical protection from u...not only physically...mentally tooooooo...
thanks for understanding dear...i love u...but i will not sit don and shut up if he does it again.....whether he is ur friend or not.....misses
7:04 AM
precious belle
My baby sis...her bf-weili.....and daddy
group dinner
my family
the sweet couple
me and shan
birthday girl and ariel
mr handsome brother of mine and notti belle
the besties
6:36 AM
it's been some time since i last post about muh doings....yeah...first of all...wat the hel am i doing at this hour of the day....yah....i did not sleep....AGAIN...it's the second day...though u guys might think its 2 days nia...no....it's been like that for quite some time le....haix..i have sleeping problems..the thing is...i dun feel tired at all at night....u might say it's habit...but it think it's madness......i would be using the com...playing facebook whole night...then wash muh clothes....doing household chores....imagine me mopping the floor in the middle of the night.....then finding things to pack and unpack...i mean....EVERYNIGHT LEH........................
right now precious belle is sleeping....ariel is at her godma place.....dearie is sleeping at his home...and i am going to wake him up later seven am....he sure gonna scream at me..for not sleeping.....oops...
something bad is just happening to me....and guess wat...of all things..my depression is back....wahahahha....one min i will be crying the other i will be laughing like a moron....take last week for an example....i dunno wat happen to me but i was so pissed off with ariel that when we reached guan....dunno wat funny thing she did that woke me up from my nap in the car....i just blew my head off that i started screaming and shouting....(not surprising right for me to do so.)..the thing is....i kept laying hands on muhself...i keep whacking my head cuz i keep telling myself cannot beat ariel....then she did not wanna wear her shoes and so i took her shoes and slap my head several times...my head was like exploding liaox....imagine a big man like dearie would also be scared.....i only know i was out of my mind then...dearie said it was becuz i tolerated and kept things to myself hence, exploded.....watever the excuse is....i know i am going crazy....just that i cannot control myself till i take my pills...i dun wanna depend on this things....but i dun think i have a choice though....god pls teach me wat to do....
that night i called my sister.....i cried nowing that she was just worried about me hitting ariel.....the next day....my beng called my aunt and she also thought the same way.....can anyone just think that i am in dangernow and not the girl...or is it so long as the girls are safe....hack care me....i dunno leh...i really wanted to talk to my aunt or sis at times but i just dunno how to tell them wat am i thinking.....i fcuking useless lar....aniways...thanks dear that u are there for me....thanks for the time when i scared u yet u willingly gave me ur promise and concern.....thank god for u.....
bought ariel a doctor play set cuz she everytime play with her yiyi-shan shan doctor...she likes it...and i am happy....dear still thinks i am spoiling her...but no la....i long long buy something for her ...thats the least i can do...i love u alot baby ariel...sorry if mummy scared u....
5:46 AM
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